I've found myself under the weather again. I had a gut wrenching stomach bug sandwiched in between Sjogren's flares. This sandwich came as a combo deal too. The boys had end of year finals and we have one boy graduating. I know, I know...those are their weights not mine but any mom will tell you the end of year paperwork is relentless. You have to be on your best game to keep up with everything. It is no time to choke on your chaotic life sandwich combo. "Do you want fries with that?"
I felt defeated again. I was lying in a wasted lump of humanness with empty Clorox wipey containers and Lysol cans on their last squirt of bio hazard magic. It got me. Damn it, it got me again!
I started to sob. David came and hugged me. "Yeah, this part is the worst of it. It's that second wave that really hurts." He was talking about the virus thing. I was sobbing about the whole shebang.
"I just don't have time to be sick! I can't be sick. The boys can't be sick. They have finals," I sobbed then flopped back into my disheveled bed.
I had to give it up. I had to give in. I was wasting so much energy on worry that I was going to for sure turn this what ever it was into something that would last a week.
It was time to call in the big guns. The Boss. God.
When you find yourself in one of those whirl wind storms that life can suck you into, let it be. Sometimes it's totally out of your hands and the best thing you can do is just offer it up. Delegate the angst to your angels and then they forward it on up to God. Who better than God? Who knows what you're up against more than the Master himself?
You have to really let it go though. God doesn't like to be micro managed. He doesn't. Who does really, right?
One of my favorite quotes from Wayne Dyer is "Good morning, this is God. I will be handling all of your problems today. I will not need your help, so have a miraculous day."
How awesome a thought is that? I often wonder what it would be like to have "people" to handle the day's chores, tasks and challenges. People with people get to sit back and do what they do best, what ever that is.
It must take a lot of trust though. There must be a sense of trust to relinquish important tasks into other hands. Capable hands they must be.
Well...I have people. In fact David reminded me of that this week when he said,"You must know someone high up. God took care of your garden for you while you were sick." He was right. It rained for days in a row. Perfect rain, off and on. God ordered the rain and the angels helped fend off the pests.
I have people. Have your people call my people and we'll do lunch. (Nothing too spicy, ok?)